Father, into your hands I. . .

Since I began writing this Blog, I have developed this obsessive habit of being hyper-attentive to epiphanies that occur to me as I live life — a powerful story, a humorous event, a profound quote, a theological nugget, or just a mere nothing that amplifies that still, small Voice. Then I jot my thoughts down on napkins or business cards wrinkled in my wallet in order to later retrieve them and weave these treasures into a post.

The unexpected gift of this new awareness is that it has made me keenly alert to signs of God’s wisdom at work all around me all the time. I am ever more confirmed in believing the good teacher is always first the best learner.

Agony, Surrender

I was speaking on the phone yesterday with a woman whose mother has, in her old age, become disabled and suffers from severe dementia. A year ago, this woman was agonizing over how to care for her Mom (she has several kids and she works  one-and-a-half full time jobs), as her siblings were washing their hands clean of any responsibility. I had not spoken with this woman in a year, so my first question was about her Mom. Her reply was worth noting on a napkin.

I have to tell you. After months of agonizing over it, one night I just fell down on the floor in my bedroom before God and said, “Lord, you have to take care of this; I give up. You know I love my Mom and would do anything for her, but I don’t have strength to care for her and she would be crushed to go into an institution. My Mom is your daughter: please, please take care of her.

The next morning I got a call from my Mom’s sister in Chicago who said: “I have decided to take your Mom in and care for her. Can you make arrangements?”

I guess what He really wants is surrender, but I couldn’t have surrendered if I had not agonized first. Strange, isn’t it? Kinda paradoxical. Not everything in my life turns out so clear, but this really reminds me of the attitude I need to always have: All yours, God!

On the threshold of a New Year, what do you need to surrender?

I know I have my list.

4 comments on “Father, into your hands I. . .

  1. […] Since I began writing this Blog, I have developed this obsessive habit of being hyper-attentive to epiphanies that occur to me as I live life — a powerful story, a humorous event, Source: Neal Obstat Theological Opining   […]

  2. Dian Barry says:

    Yes I have my list too. I really didn’t have one until after New Year’s Eve Mass last night & today it continues to grow as Our Lord talks to me.

  3. […] Surrender More. Turn myself—and all of my troubles, worries, and needs over to God. As the first antiphon from today’s Office of readings says, Surrender to God, and he will do everything for you. For a lovely reflection on surrendering to God read this post from Dr. Tom Neal. […]

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